The new year is upon us. With no dramatic world ending in 2012, everybody in debt in January, we once again reach the position where many dreams lie ahead, many goals have been set, and the world continues to spin on the sound of money machines.
As a starving creative in the media industry, the world can look unbelievably dim and incredibly hopeless at times for me – well, atleast the world I create for myself. The dream is to be the main man at any of the top 5 ad agencies in the world! The dream is epically huge! To work for one of the top 5 ad agencies in the world, and to become media industry legends! The task to get there is even bigger and incredibly overwhelming. Eventually the hassle of hunting down jobs and self-searching for work takes its toll on one starving creative. The world no longer needs to tell you you’re not good enough, you replace your own enemies to take the place of being your own worst enemy. You start doubting every ounce of potential you once thought you had. You start second guessing yourself. You see others getting work, winning awards, making money, reaching their goals… and you look at your own work, and shiver. Being human as I am, the incredible irony of my situation is then rather comical. I professionally procrastinate. I don’t deserve to currently be at the top of the world!
With no freelance jobs coming in, a terrible sense of financial maturity, and an incredibly confusing sense of pride and arrogance, it has been on too many occasions I have found myself taking comfort, escapism and solace in the wonderful world of sleep, sleep, sleep and procrastination. The routine is rather self-destructive, disgustingly enjoyable, and goes something like this.
- Tired of life? Sleep.
- Angry at the world? Sleep
- Got a great business idea? Jot it down… follow it up a little… procrastinate… give up… sleep
- Need to submit work? Procrastinate… deliver good work (not great) late… then sleep
- Tired of sleeping? Sleep
The cycle starts to become seemingly endless. Where you once saw yourself as a man with great hopes and dreams, you slowly watch yourself dwindling to the bottom of the world. You’re becoming more sour by the day. Hundreds of unfinished projects, countless rejected proposals, constantly underpaid for design work, too many ambitious business ideas that never saw the light of day… it all starts to creep into your mind. “Maybe I’m just not good enough. Maybe the hill is too high to climb. Maybe all these dreams are for the rich and fortunate. Let me procrastinate. Let me sleep this all away. Maybe it will all be better when I wake up.”
Ofcourse the reality is, maybe I’m just making excuses. Correction: I AM MAKING EXCUSES! When I’m comfortably wrapped up in my blanket midday sleeping, dreaming and being unproductive, all the people who really want their dreams to come true, are actually chasing them. When I’m procrastinating, surfing the internet for hours, chatting on my cell phone to friends, doing nothing really epic with my time… all the serious dream chasers are seriously doing what they do best; Chasing their dreams, delivering on time, pushing for greatness and ofcourse, not making excuses.
The world is a tough place. I am learning that the hard way. No-one is owed anything. And what they say about needing a thick skin? Its 100% fact! You’re dead without it.
Maybe its time I grow up. If I don’t work, I shall starve and be poor forever. I know I have talent… but now I need to show up. Its everything or nothing. And if I’m not willing to pay the costs to be the boss, my mouth is most useful when it is shut closed.